The Absurd Implications of a Christian Worldview

The idea of an afterlife appeals strongly to the human mind for one obvious reason: we don’t want to die. It can be scary to contemplate one’s mortality, and it’s much more comforting to believe that our existence will continue after our time here on Earth is done. Human nature entices us to believe that death isn't the end, which is why virtually every culture has its own afterlife mythology. So it isn't shocking that many people profess a belief in Heaven, an afterlife of eternal bliss. However, I suspect that belief in Heaven is superficial; that is, deep down, even the most passionate theists realize it is a delusion. I’ll focus on the Christian Heaven in this post, but my argument could apply to other religions as well.

When it comes to Heaven, Christians display a blatant example of cognitive dissonance. In one sense, they do believe, but only as a practical means of coping with the painful conclusion that they are mortal. People don’t like to think about that, and Heaven is a useful tool for putting it out of mind. And yet, at the same time, Christians’ actions indicate that they do not truly believe. Despite all their supposed faith, Christians behave as if Heaven doesn't exist.

Heaven is a place of eternal joy and happiness where Christians go after death. No matter how awesome your life on Earth is, it couldn't possibly be as good as Heaven, which is infinitely good. This leads to a rather startling conclusion: if you are a Christian, you should be eagerly anticipating your own death as well as the deaths of other Christians. Why would you want anyone to spend another moment living this (comparatively) miserable existence when they could be experiencing infinite happiness?  Indeed, you should be hoping for all Christians to die as soon as possible since the Bible clearly states that believers go to Heaven: “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16)

It would be going too far to hasten death by murdering someone or committing suicide since God has a commandment against killing.¹ Even passively allowing someone to die would contradict Jesus’ message in the parable of the Good Samaritan (though Christians still do it all the time). Perhaps you could get away with intentionally engaging in risky behaviors in order to maximize your chance of dying in an accident. I know of no Bible verse which expressly forbids this, but it doesn't really matter as my argument does not depend on that point. At the very least, from a Christian perspective, it would still be fantastic news to hear that you have cancer or that your Christian family member has died even if the rules don’t allow you to make that happen as quickly as possible.

So, why are Christians sad when their fellow Christians die? Usually their response is that they miss their loved ones even though they will one day be reunited with them. After all, atheists also miss their friends and family who leave for long stretches of time even if they will eventually return. But there are two important distinctions to take note of. First, atheists don’t believe that their loved one is experiencing ultimate joy. If they did, they would be much more inclined to feel happy for that person. And second, from an atheist’s perspective, there is only a finite amount of time to spend with that person. If a friend studies abroad for a year, then that is a significant chunk of life that he will not get to spend with that friend. But from a Christian’s perspective, any time spent apart from a close friend is dwarfed by the eternity that they will get to spend together after death. Why would you care about missing out on a few short years together when you will literally have forever to catch up with that person later on? If I have an infinite amount of money, and I lose ten dollars, then I have lost 0% of my wealth. Such a loss would not be worth getting even marginally upset about.

Okay, I’ll admit I’m being a little unfair with this analysis. It’s human nature to be more concerned with short-term consequences, so maybe Christians just can’t help feeling sad when their fellow Christians die. It’s understandable why it would be difficult for Christians not to be upset by the fact that right now they are separated from their loved one. It may be decades before they ever see that person again, and that’s a long time to wait. Still, you’d at least expect Christians to be much less sad at funerals than atheists are. This is not what I’ve observed in my own experience. Look into the eyes of a grieving Christian, and you will see someone who is overcome with immeasurable sadness, just as any nonbeliever would be. If they truly believe what they claim to believe, then they are being incredibly selfish. The deceased person is, after all, not only in a better place, but the best possible place. Why wouldn't you be happy for that person? Think how self-centered it is to be stricken with such profound grief only because you won’t get to see that person for awhile.

And while I’m willing to cut Christians some slack on this point on a purely emotional level, the intellectual argument still stands just as strong. It’s possible to be sad about something on the inside while still understanding that it was for the better. A parent, for example, might be sad to see his child grow up and lose his innocence while still realizing that it was overall a positive thing. So, hearing that your pastor has cancer should still be awesome news for believers, and Christians should recognize this even if they’re teary-eyed when they say it.² But can you imagine how the congregation would react if somebody told the pastor, “Congratulations!”? There would be outrage! They would insist what a tragedy it was and hope for the pastor to recover. Without being a douche about it, I think Christians need to be challenged on this. Why is it such a tragedy?

Even if Christians are let completely off the hook for not wanting their loved ones to immediately die because they will miss them, they’d still need to answer why they don’t eagerly anticipate their own deaths. Sure, from a Christian perspective, if you die, then you’ll miss your living family that you've left behind³, but what about the people who are already in Heaven that you’ll finally be reunited with? You've been missing them ever since they died. I suppose it depends on whether you have more loved ones who have already passed away or who are still living on Earth, but either way, you’d think that the prospect of infinite happiness would be enough to tip the scale towards wanting to die.

But perhaps I am overlooking something important. When a Christian dies, isn't it a lost opportunity to spread the faith? If that person had lived longer, maybe he would have influenced another person to accept Christ. It would be well worth it to spend another few years on Earth if it will save somebody’s soul. The problem with this line of thinking is that the opposite could be true too; that is, maybe the person who died would have converted away from Christianity had he lived any longer. In fact, the second scenario is actually the more likely one. A recent survey by Pew shows that Christianity is rapidly declining in America. This is occurring partly because the more secular younger generations are replacing the more religious older ones, but it’s also a trend within generations, suggesting that individual people are ditching religion. For a Christian, this creates an even stronger sense of urgency to die; you better hurry up and get into Heaven before the atheists persuade you to deny God.

           There are people in this world who actually believe in an afterlife. A group of them flew planes into the World Trade Center towers on September 11, 2001. They were people who followed the implications of their beliefs to their logical conclusions and acted accordingly. Now, I’m not suggesting that Christians should take up suicide terrorism; I only bring this up to make the following point. Anyone who really believes what he says he believes won’t find the implications of those beliefs to be absurd. I have laid out the implications of a Christian worldview, and if you refuse to accept them, well then you don’t really believe what Christianity teaches. At the very least, you have serious doubts about your faith. Some Christians openly admit that they are doubtful, so this post is directed more towards the 80% of Americans who claim to “never doubt” the existence of God. I’m calling your bluff. It’s childish to make up stories about a magical place where you go after death. I’m sorry, but it really is. Christianity in the 21^st century may be a mile wide, but it’s only an inch deep.

Here is a funny video illustrating this point. 

1.One wonders why God himself doesn't spare people of their miserable lives on Earth and just create people already in Heaven, but that is a topic for another blog post.

2. Perhaps you could make a case that it would be bad for the pastor to die if, say, he has children who are financially dependent on him. Just assume for the sake of this example that he doesn't.

3. Then again, if you are sad about missing someone who is still on Earth, then how could you be infinitely happy as people in Heaven supposedly are? This leads to another problem with the idea of Heaven: how could you possibly be happy there while knowing that your friends and family who weren't Christians didn't make it and are being forever tormented in Hell?